Yesterday I posted my opinion on the quality of some of the dating advice out there. Okay, it was more of rant really but I believe I got my point across.
The piece of advice I was commenting on–“Don’t talk about your child(ren) on the first date…”–does have an instance or two in which it would be smart to use.
Instance # 1: When you’re on a date with someone from whom you have no intention of seeking anything long-term. Perhaps you plan on dating this person for a while, having a little fun then amicably parting ways. In this situation, keeping the particulars of your personal life quiet is probably the best bet.
This doesn’t mean you have to lie (I will never endorse lying of any kind) or that I advocate not telling this person all about you, but when you know there’s no real future with this person, why waste time telling him about your son’s favorite character on Spongebob or what your daughter wants to be when she grows up?
Usually all these type of fellas wanna know is that you enjoy having “fun” with them and when you can hang out again. How can you tell if he’s that type of fella? The things he talks about, how inquisitive he is about your life apart from him, and whether he is a self-proclaimed lifetime bachelor. For example, I can tell a guy is into more than just the “fun” when I tell him I’m a single mom and he immediately asks questions about my daughter or encourages conversation revolving around kid-related topics or subjects. It can be tricky to discern his type straight away, but if you pay attention to your instincts, you’ll know.
As a side note, paying attention and listening to your instincts is a MUST for any woman but especially for single women. All too many times we hear those alarm bells in our heads but ignore them letting our left brains rationalize away what our right brains were picking up on.
Do NOT doubt your gut feelings; they are often the best, most honest reactions to any situation.