Yesterday I shared a fun little post about America’s hidden problem: literature abuse. But many of you may now be asking yourselves, “am I an abuser?” Complete this short test to find out.
Self-Test for Literature Abuse
How many of these apply to you?
1. I have read fiction when I was depressed, or to cheer myself up.
2. I have gone on reading binges of an entire book or more in a day.
3. I read rapidly, often ‘gulping’ chapters.
3. I have sometimes read early in the morning, or before work.
4. I have hidden books in different places to sneak a chapter without being seen.
5. Sometimes I avoid friends or family obligations in order to read novels.
6. Sometimes I re-write film or television dialog as the characters speak.
7. I am unable to enjoy myself with others unless there is a book nearby.
8. At a party, I will often slip off unnoticed to read.
9. Reading has made me seek haunts and companions which I would otherwise avoid.
10. I have neglected personal hygiene or household chores until I had finished a novel.
12. I have spent money meant for necessities on books instead.
13. I have attempted to check out more library books than permitted.
14. Most of my friends are heavy fiction readers.
15. I have sometimes passed out from a night of heavy reading.
16. I have suffered ‘blackouts’ or memory loss from a bout of reading.
17. I have wept, become angry or irrational because of something I read.
18. I have sometimes wished I did not read so much.
19. Sometimes I think my fiction reading is out of control.
If you answered ‘yes’ to three or more of these questions, you may be a
literature abuser. Affirmative responses to five or more indicates a
serious problem.
[I did NOT create the above test. This was published as “anonymous” in an e-mail I read back in 1999.]
What about a number 20: I willingly read the “50 Shades” trilogy even though I’m smart enough to know better. If that’s not abuse, I don’t know what is. 🙂
The question now: is there a 12 step program? Honestly, though, I think I’d rather wallow in my shame. 😉